Just when Zoe thinks she's all alone in this world, an old woman passes on her bewitched Gnome (Verne Troyer), who is bound by magic to protect his master. Zoe quickly realizes that he isn't your garden variety gnome, when he begins eliminating her enemies in extravagant displays of revenge. Zoe must find a way to stop this mischievous gnome, before Zoe and her friends become victims of his trickery.

Keith Lemon ( ) is preparing to take his invention, the securipole, which he has been attempting to lift off the ground for twenty years, to a business convention in London. Meanwhile, his girlfriend Rosie (Laura Aikman) has discovered that she is pregnant, but due to Keith being away, instead confides in his best friend, Dougie (Kevin Bishop). At the convention, the securipole fails to attract any big investor attention, and back at home, an order of 1,000,000 securipoles arrives, much to Rosie and Dougie's dismay. Realising that his invention may never be successful, and that he now owes Evil Steve (Leigh Francis) a ton of money for the securipoles, Lemon decides to stay in London, and takes the advice of fellow businessman Kushvinder (Harish Patel), and accepts the gift of a new style mobile phone that Kushvinder has invented. Attempting to turn the gift into his next money-making scheme, Lemon accepts an offer to appear on David Hasselhoff's prime time television chat ...

The story begins with a regular Joe who tries desperately to seek employment, but embarks on a violent rampage when he teams up with cult leader Uncle Dave. Their first act is to heist an amusement park, only to learn that the Taliban are planning the same heist as well. Chaos ensues, and now the Postal Dude must not only take on terrorists but political figures as well.

Born in America, but raised in Havemahkeeta in India, with a population of 76, Maurice had always to better Deepak Chopra, and be sexually active, ever since he was 12. His Guru, Tugginmypudha, while approving of Deepak, cautions Maurice and has a chastity belt put around his waist. Years later, Maurice has established himself as Guru Pitka in America, but would like to appear in the Oprah Show and be better than Deepak Chopra. When Jane Bullard from the the Toronto Maple Leafs hires him to counsel their star hockey player, Darren Roanoke, to win back his wife, Prudence, from Kings' star player, Jacques Grande, and also stand up to his dominating mother, Lilian, he agrees to do so - with hilarious results.